Basic human kindness

“Can I get a small cup or water please?” I say to the young woman behind the counter at the pretzel place located in the large convention hotel where I am speaking this week. I had just purchased a pretzel and added that I needed water to take some medicine.

“Uh, we don’t sell water,” she says. “All we have is tap water, she notes,” pointing over her shoulder to the sink right behind her.

“That works for me,” I say. But just as she turns around, her manager stops her and she says to me, “No, we can’t give you water. Sorry.”

“It’s just a small cup,” I say. I need to take some medicine.

“Sorry,” she repeats rather dismissively. “Can’t do it. But there is a Starbucks next door, and you can buy water there.” She then moves to the side and starts wiping down the counter, no longer making eye contact with me. The first employee stands there frozen with the small cup still in her hand, and gives me the nonverbal “sorry” face.

So, because I teach this, and there was nobody else standing in line, I decided to play this out. I very calmly asked the manager why she could not give me a small cup of water. I remind her that I am a customer and just paid nine dollars for a pretzel and that I would really appreciate a small cup of tap water.

Once again, she was very short and dismissive, repeating that they could not provide water. She said “sorry” once again and turned her back to me this time aggressively wiping down the counter. So, I decided to change it up and clarified that I do not need them to give me a cup of water, but I just wanted to know why she would not allow it. This time she would not turn around and repeated: “Sorry. We can’t.” So, I left.

What has happened to civility and basic human kindness? To be clear, this was in a resort hotel. They weren’t having to deal with vagrants, or busy with a line of customers waiting. For all of us in and out of business, opportunities exist at every turn to do the right thing or simply the kind thing. Whether offering a simple cup of water or denying the use of a restroom to a person in need, too many decline to show humanity. We can do better. Tell your employees that you expect them to do well, but also to do good.